The time-honored tradition of spring break came early this year and in rare form.  As a new grad student, I felt the prerogative to indulge and seek some sunshine for a week; however, this was not the normal co-ed drunken hook-up Daytona Beach spring break. I escaped to Naples, Florida for some much-needed R&R&R (rest, relaxation and rejuvenation). There was just one catch – I shared my vacation with six other family members.

Imagine if you can for a moment seven women, ages 24 – 58, sharing a condo for one week. Estrogen wafted through the air at dangerously high levels like delicate soap bubbles waiting to burst. Luckily, the layout of the condo positioned allies to opposite corners like boxers in a ring. Physical space and adherence to a few simple rules allowed for a happy and harmonious week, completely free of disaster.

If you ever find yourself in a situation like this, please take heed my advice and follow these vital rules:

1. Two rental cars are a must – It is almost impossible to get seven women interested in the same thing at the same time, let alone actually mobilize them. A vacation is a respite from the routines and obligations of daily life, so there should not be any obligations to participate in group activities.
2. Money doesn’t matter– There is no use in worrying about getting ripped off or sticking to a budget. There is no easy way to divide a bill in a big group. Try to get your hands on a company credit card if you can.
3. Now is not the time to quit smoking or give up any vices – No matter how well you get along with the people you are with, seven consecutive days is a lot of face time. You can combat someone else’s annoying habit by indulging yours to preserve sanity.
4. Every hour of the day is fair game for happy hour – If it is a true vacation, you will lose track of time and relish in it. Besides, even if its 11:00 a.m., pina coladas just taste better on the beach.
5. Assign everyone a job – Natural talents will emerge and you will find a chef, a driver, a jester, a cleaner and a mediator in every group. Go with it and stay out of each other’s way.
6. Have mercy on the white girl  - There is always a fair-skinned girl in the bunch that might not be able to handle six hours of direct, scorching sunlight, so you must be accommodating. Enjoying an olive skin-tone, I recently learned that umbrellas are not only used for rain.
7. Nothing is sacred - Common courtesy and discretion no longer take precedence. Be prepared to see more skin than expected and use physical force to get some bathroom time. Check your suitcase for valuables, as there is bound to be not only a streaker in every group, but also a klepto.