How exactly does one review half a film? That's the problem with attempting to judge Quentin Tarantino's latest work, "Kill Bill Volume 1." Part two isn't due in theaters for months and since part one is a cliffhanger, it has no real ending.

One thing we know going into the film is that the main character, a professional killer played by Uma Thurman, cannot die in these 90 minutes. Else, what would we watch in part two?

The Bride has just awoken from a four-year coma, during which time she's been whored out by a male ward nurse, and she's got a list of people upon whom she will exact revenge for the brutal shooting that put her in the coma. She was pregnant and at her wedding and her unborn child was one of nine murdered that day.

Using her massive skills as a samurai, knife wielder, acrobat and martial artist, The Bride makes fairly quick work of the first few folks on her list. The rest, we presume, will be summarily dealt with in part two.

Thurman rivals Jennifer Garner for her kicks-really-high skills, and she's able to alternate her tough gal attitude with some light one liners Tarantino tosses in, we presume as relief from his turgid dialogue, which rarely rises about hackneyed.

And that's one of the problems with "Kill Bill." Unless Tarantino is subtly parodying the action films of the '60s and '70s -- from spaghetti westerns to blaxploitation to kung fu flicks and television's "Charlie's Angels" -- "Kill Bill" is little more than a genre-hopping bag of clichés.

The fight scenes are action-packed and the sword battles are loaded with the sort of high-flying dreamy action that made "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" so watchable. But, since we know there's no chance of The Bride getting flayed, it's all a little ho-hum.

And, from the "Pussy Wagon" to the catfights, the entire film - which we'd like to read as a testament to the strength of women - looks more like the wet dream of a 14-year-old boy. In that sense, "Kill Bill" is like most of Tarantino's other work; heavy on action and blood (you'll see more in 90 minutes than an ER nurse sees in a year) and light on purpose.

Although Tarantino has formidable filmmaking skills, he's clearly got nothing worthwhile to say, which explains why he seems to have dished up variations on the same theme for a decade now. What a waste, unless your taste for onscreen blood is unquenchable.

"Kill Bill Volume 1" opens everywhere Fri., Oct. 10.