Not to toot my own horn, but you may recognize my name from traffic reports on various radio stations in the area. No, this isn't an "I'm kind of a big deal" type of blog, so bear with me.

Like many Milwaukeeans, I had to work today while many others opted to sit in line for bargain shopping. The only difference is, instead of reporting on the travel times and accidents along the area freeways, my co-workers and I were stuck reporting on the parking situation at local malls.

Watching the pictures from our helicopter and hearing the reports from our mall contacts absolutely shook my mind. When I got to the office at 4:30 a.m., the lots at two particular stores and a nearby mall were completely and totally full. Traffic was backed up for blocks trying to get into the lot. Shouldn't that be a sign?

What on earth is the appeal of standing in line for however many hours, outside, in the cold to save $200 on one of the five laptops that are actually in the store? That doesn't seem like a really good deal to me, especially if today is a rare day off.

I'm in the hunt for a big-screen HDTV and a "big boy bed." I sat with my better half Thursday night scouring the ads. There seemed to be some pretty good deals, but even if I had today off, I don't think that anybody could pry my comatose body out of bed at 3 a.m. to sit in line and buy one of the darn things.

It's not so much that I'm anti-shopping; I'm actually one of the few guys in the world that doesn't really mind killing a few hours at the mall. I just can't stand the insanity that spews forth on "Black Friday."

Maybe it stems back to being dragged along with my mother and relatives for their day after Thanksgiving shopping excursions. I remember seeing people going absolutely crazy over some stupid trinket or chochky that nobody in their right mind would buy were it not significantly discounted for that particular day.

Turn on the news today and you're likely to see video of people making a mad dash inside the doors as a store opens for business this morning. You'll see fights, yelling, scream and absolute stupidity. Thanks, but I'll pass. Are the savings really worth the hassle?

So enjoy your shopping today. I'll be keeping an eye on the lots and the roads near the malls while many of you go join the mob. Meanwhile, I'll be doing my Christmas shopping, too.

Except I'll be avoiding the malls, the rush, the headaches and the hassles by shopping online (many retailers are offering free shopping on orders today). If I get done in time, I might swing down to the Historic Third Ward or up to Brady Street to check out some of the wares being peddled by local store owners.